I am a businesswoman and I am in the business of women. I am sure you have other terms for me… pimp..madame…whore… But before you give me your two cents about how I should be ashamed of myself I have one question for you.

Are you fucking?

…. I’ll wait.

Now I am supposed to think that you are better than me because you are fucking for free and I am fucking for Fendi.

Wouldn’t you rather be getting more than a sore back, maybe a meal and if you are lucky a light bill paid?

… I’ll wait.

And don’t try to convince me, or yourself for that matter, that you have never thought about it. We have all thought about. We have all rolled over and looked at the back of a bitch that we hardly knew wondering what in drunken hell just happened. Wouldn’t it be nice to know that all you have to say is “Times up” and she would stumble her drunken ass out of the room and leave behind a few hundred dollar bills to show she appreciated your time?

I was tired of fucking for appletinis. I didn’t want to end up with a worn out slit, a woman that I couldn’t stand and a slew of crying, whining, needy kids (that I didn’t even push out)…. Shoot me now.

So I decided one night that the next time I was going to get down, I would definitely be coming up. Eleven months and 160,000 dollars later, life is good. My pussy is still moist and my bank account is swelling. I have a few girls on my team now to “share the load” and I’m having a ball doing it. This is why I can’t believe I am in the position I am in. Am I really considering giving it up? For Her.

Women. Can’t live with them, can’t make a living without them.